P. S. I Wrote This

I wonder if you know that there are days when I feel empty and lost, days where I do not understand how to keep moving through life at all. There are days when I cannot express what I feel, when emotions sit heavy in silence and nothing about life makes sense to me. There are days when I feel content with everything around me, and then there are days when anxiety wraps itself around my thoughts. There are days when the unknown future terrifies me, and then there are days when I pause, breathe in and out, and whisper to myself that everything is happening for a reason, that somehow, everything is working in my favor. There are days when I do not know where to look for help, when everything feels dark and distant. There are days when I do not understand life at all, and there are also days when I am finally okay with not understanding it at all. I wonder if you know… That my mind overshares every fear with me until I lose my sense of calm. That sometimes it feels like anxiety is just a t...

The world sees laughter upon my face,  yet fears the pain my heart embraces. How can I hand my heart away, when nothing inside me chose to stay? What once was mine, they tore apart, piece by piece, they stripped my heart. And what remains so bruised and torn, no longer wishes to beat till dawn Still, in this chaos, I survive, hoping someday I'll feel alive but every evening fades to grey, and every night loses its taste away. The ones who were meant to be my own, still left me feeling so alone. And now they say with careless eyes, "love again...perhaps this time."